Why One Should Not Go On Exchange Trips
by yamimoon and white cross
Summary: FIRST FIC! (be nice the the new kids) The yu-gi-oh ppl go to USA via school exchange trip. Will they survive the american people, food, and teachers? read and review!
1. Of Deaththreats and Exchange Trips

yamimoon: Hi! this is our first fic!

white cross: Be easy on us! OR ELSE!

yamimoon: I'm sure u dont wanna know wut that else is, so just read and review!

white cross: Empisis on the review part.

yamimoon: Oh yes, we dont own yu-gi-oh, of course! do we look japanese? not at all! red hair is irish!

white cross: Just get on with the fic yamimoon! You're gonna bore the readers!

yamimoon: Read and enjoy!

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"Blah"-talking

'Blah'-thoughts

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He glared.  
  
A shrewd, ice-cold glace that could never-the-less melt through and quite possibly a large bull elephant.  
  
A harmless slip of paper on his desk was the innocent victim of this glare.  
  
"US Exchange Trip: visit new places, learn new things, and make new friends! If interested, sign up ASAP by the end of the week." Ice blue eyes scanned the paper. "I didn't think the school could sink any lower. Apparently I was mistaken."  
  
Seto Kaiba, certified teenage genius, billionaire and professional arrogant jerk wondered why he was even in school. He was, of course, more intelligent than these single-digit IQ teachers. At first he wanted something to do other than work to occupy his time, but little did he know that spending hours locked up in this dismal classroom would take away a large chunk of his sanity.  
  
His thoughts were cut short, however, when his cell phone rang, even though the teachers insisted that there was to be no cell phones in class. They did this politely, of course.  
  
"Kaiba speaking."  
  
"Kaiba." It was those bothersome Big Five again. "Just hold onto your precious company for now, for it will soon be ours! MWUAHAHAHAHA!! You can't hide from us!! MWUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! We can read your every move, and soon you'll be DEAD!! MWUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA-!"  
  
The Big Five were cut short when Kaiba, exasperated, hung up the phone.  
  
Kaiba blinked. He was not having a good day: first his coffee spilled on his nice, freshly pressed shirt, then Mokuba dropped his monthly report into the pool, and now this disturbing, not to mention clichéd, death threat.  
  
'We can ready your every move...' But they would never suspect the great Seto Kaiba to sign up for a school exchange trip to the USA, aka land of the pigs, of all places. So that was exactly what he was going to do.

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white cross: Now review!

yamimoon: Suggestions would rock!

white cross: Thats right, click that little button in the lower left hand coner of the screen and write something good in the box that pops up!

yamimoon: bah-bye now! 'super market lady smile' have a nice day!


	2. Of Pop Quizes and Frog Guts

yamimoon: Hi. I wrote this chappie. I feel so special!  
  
white cross: But not special enough to own Yu-gi-oh....  
  
yamimoon: Yes, alas, I don't own Yu-gi-oh. It's on my to-do list. And now a random word from our sponsors:  
  
white cross: SOCK SLIDING!!! WEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!  
  
yamimoon: No comment. Uh, on with da ficcy!!!  
  
( ) = author's note  
  
A pointy haired teenager sat bent over on his wobbly lab stool, attempting to not fall off while examining a small slip of paper. His eyes narrowed as the stool creaked and tipped, but with tremendous effort he righted the stool. Because he was engrossed with the slip of paper and not falling over, he didn't notice his tough looking blond classmate approach him and make a futile attempt to flatten his friend's carefully spiked hair.  
  
"NOT THE HAIR!!!!!!" Yugi screeched, for the fifth time that day, and immediately raised his arms to protect his precisely pointed hair. Without the support of his arms, the chair swayed precariously, and then toppled over, taking Yugi with it.  
  
"Joey, what's with you recent obsession of attempting to ruin my hair?! That's the fifth time today you tried with no avail to mess it up! Do you know how long it took me to make these spikes perfect?" In his furious mood, he answered his own question. "Three hours, a ruler, and five containers of hair gel! Stop trying to mess it up!" Yugi seethed with anger and slammed the slip of paper he had been reading onto the table.  
  
"Don't hurt yourself, Yugi. I was only joking around! And besides, not even a herd of stampeding elephants could mess up your hair job." And, with an effort to change the subject: "What's that slip of paper?"  
  
"Oh, it's something about a USA exchange trip. I was reading it, before you attacked me!!!"  
  
"Cool!!! An exchange trip, huh? To the USA... Wonder what its like over there? Do ya think it's as crowded as Tokyo?"  
  
"Joey, there is no place on earth as crowded as Tokyo. Not that I know of at least. I do hear that the Americans are real slobs. Lazy and wasteful, too. I dunno if I want to go meet such people."  
  
"Well, I bet we would get out of school for a few weeks at least. That would be worth any bad people we meet in America...."  
  
"Yeah, I guess so.... If you are going, I will come with."  
  
"Maybe we can get Serenity, Tea, and Tristan to come. Maybe even Bakura, if he doesn't decide to try to murder us again."  
  
"Ok then Joey, I will sign us up to go, and you can ask Serenity, Tea, and Tristan, since they are in your math class. I will ask Bakura, he is in Biology with me."  
  
"See ya after school then! I gotta go spread the good news to the others!"  
  
Joey speed walked through the hallway to math class, which was very unusual for him, since he habitually just skipped that class or came really late. Hoping that Tea, Tristan, and Serenity were early too, he entered the classroom. His sensei gave him a surprised look, but just nodded as Joey walked across the room to where Tea was. Obviously, Serenity and Tristan weren't there yet, which made him queasy. "They better not be doing anything...hem hem that I wouldn't want them to do," Joey thought nervously.  
  
"Hey Tea!"  
  
"Hello Joey, what are you doing in math class so early?"  
  
"Well, Yugi was reading this slip of paper and attempting to balance on a wobbly lab stool, and I came up to him and poked his hair, like I usually do, and he got all angry and and and..."  
  
"Get to the point!!!"  
  
"Oh yeah," Joey scratched his head and remembered what he was going to say. "Anyway, the paper Yugi was reading was about an exchange trip to the USA, and we both are gonna go. You wanna come with? We can miss a few weeks of school!"  
  
"I dunno, I don't want to fall too far behind in my school work, and plus I have a job and all...."  
  
Joey rolled his eyes and decided to give the one reason he knew she would go for. "But Tea, if you don't go, imagine all of the new friends you won't make!"  
  
As he predicted, Tea went right for it, hook, line and sinker. "When do we leave?"  
  
"In a week."  
  
"Great!!! I will start packing tonight!!! YAY! New friends, new friends, new friends..."  
  
Joey rolled his eyes yet again at his friend's craziness, and wondered for probably the 15th time that week if Tea was sane. (She really needs see a doctor in my opinion, but that's off the topic.) He just shook his head and looked to the door to see Tristan and Serenity enter the classroom. Joey's eyes narrowed as he discovered that Tristan had his hand around Serenity's waist.  
  
"Hey Serenity...Tristan." Joey's voice dripped with malice as he spoke Tristan's name.  
"Howdy, Joey." greeted Tristan, oblivious to Joey's fury.  
  
"Hey... Joey." Serenity spoke softly, knowing from Joey's reddening face that he did not approve of her being with Tristan.  
  
"I hope you two haven't been doing anything that hem hem I wouldn't agree with."  
  
"Of course not Joey! We were just talking about how much we studied for the math quiz today." Serenity smiled, knowing that Joey had no knowledge of any quiz.  
  
"Shoot! What quiz?!" Joey was hit, bull's eye, with the horrifying new idea of taking a quiz without knowing a thing about what it was on.  
  
"Oh, you know, that quiz on trigonometry that sensei has been getting us ready for, for ages?" Tristan teased, noticing that he had found one of Joey's weak spots.  
  
"Well, I will be going soon then, but before I leave, I gotta ask you two a question. Yugi, Tea, and me are going on an exchange trip to the USA. Wanna come?"  
  
"Sure, if it will get me out of school." Tristan smiled in his head. It would be great if he could miss his upcoming history test on the rulers of feudal Japan.  
  
"Of course we are missing school, Tristan. Why else would I be going?" Joey also wanted to miss this quiz, for he skipped history class along with most of his other classes.  
  
"Well, then count me in." Tristan gave Joey the thumbs up sign and headed to his seat.  
  
"Me too!" Serenity smiled and headed to her seat as Joey sprinted out the door.  
  
Yugi wandered into biology class, dreading that this day had finally come. No, there was no pop quiz or test today. No, they weren't going to change seats today. No, today wasn't the day they had a substitute teacher. No, they were going to do the thing that most high-schoolers who took biology usually looked forward to. They were going to dramatic pause dissect frogs.  
  
As most of you know, dissections of any kind are very messy, and you usually end up with some of the creature's fluids splattered on you shirt. After the dissection, it takes usually an hour on average to clean out the gunk from under your fingernails. And finally, you have to deal with the thought of killing another living thing. Yugi didn't mind any of these things that much. Well, maybe he did feel bad about the killing part, but that's not the point. What he really despised about dissections was the smell. It is like a combination of rotten eggs, dirty socks, and your dad's old shoes with a hint of that mush that has been sitting in your refrigerator for a few years. Yugi had tried covering his nose with a nose plug, but the smell got through. He had tried holding it with his hand, but his hand was covered with the smell. He even tried to stop breathing, but of course he just passed out onto the dissection table just when his lab partner had opened up the animal. After waking up three hours later in the hospital, Yugi decided that he would never do a lab dissection again, not even if they chained him to his lab stool, held a gun to his head, and said, "You better do this dissection or else I'll SHOOT YOU IN THE HEAD!"  
  
Yugi cautiously took his seat as if he thought a dead frog was already at his table. He gazed around the room and knew that this dissection was going to be just as bad as the last. To Yugi's horror, there sat a jar of frogs, still hopping and croaking bloody murder.  
  
Just then, Bakura entered the room and spied Yugi.  
  
"Hey Yugi!" said Bakura.  
  
"Hi Bakura." said Yugi nervously, as he glanced around the room.  
  
"Guess what day it is today!" chirped Bakura, oblivious to Yogi's anxiety.  
  
"Frog dissection day." Hate was overflowing from each word.  
  
Still unaware, Bakura cheerily replied, "That's right! I am so excited! I hope it is as fun as it was last year....oh yeah, last year wasn't that good for you, I remember. Didn't you pass out?"  
  
"Yeah, I did."  
  
"Oh, too bad, then I guess you aren't looking forward to it."  
  
"Yeah, I am positively dreading it."  
  
"It can't be that bad, I mean, it only smells like rotten eggs, dirty socks, and your dad's old shoes with a hint of that mush that has been sitting in your refrigerator for a few years. I have smelled worse."  
  
Looking as if he was about to loose his lunch, Yugi delivered his message hurriedly. "Look, I am not feeling that well, so I gotta just ask you a question before the dissection starts while I still can talk...ummm, Joey, Tea, Tristan, Serenity and I are going on an exchange trip to the US, so do you wanna come with?" he said in one breath.  
  
"The USA huh? Sounds like fun! And I would get to miss school and I would get out of having to baby-sit for those two brats next door, and...Yugi, are you alright?"  
  
Yugi, green-faced and covering his mouth, dashed out of the room in the direction of the bathroom.  
  
white cross: And that would be chapter two. Which I did not write. Yes, so if you have a problem with this chapter, don't come running to me.  
  
yamimoon: Oh thanks white cross. At least they don't know where I live.  
  
white cross: I know where you live.... Wait, that doesn't make any sense. Never mind.  
  
yamimoon: Uh...ok, well read and review!!! 


	3. our futile attempt to entertain you

The-chapter-four-that-actually-isn't-chapter-four-but-is-only-a-lame-random-thingy-that-we-made-up-to-entertain-you-since-we-haven't-updated-in-six-months-and-counting.

White cross is an old lady bent over and walking innocently down a street. Until…

(old)Yamimoon: (whacks white cross over the head with her handy dandy cane)

White cross: hey… wut was that for?

Yamimoon: you still haven't written chapter three! I have been bugging you since the year of '04.

White cross: (mumbling to herself) If I just keep walking she will go away… yeah she'll just go away… keep walking…

Yamimoon: Hey I'm talking to you!! Want your noggin dented with my sword here???! (holds up cane)

White cross: (cant hear being of hearing problem and just keeps walking)

Yamimoon: What was I doing? Oh yes, I was getting some eggs for my kitchen. Yes, my kitchen! You can never have enough eggs for your kitchen!! (walks away)

I hope that didn't deplete your brain cells too drastically. (HAHA. Who am I kidding. That was definitely the stupidest thing I've ever written. Which is saying something.)


End file.
